New Years Wish List

It is pretty apparent 'New Years Resolutions' don't stick well. Instead I desire to create a list of events, activities, progressions, and changes that I would like to accomplish or at least aim for in 2010...

Events:
-Design and host a beautiful, small wedding that is both memorable and joyful for everyone involved.
-Experience a week to remember, following the wedding, filled with John Mayer live, Dallas attractions that only tourists experience, and a road trip to anywhere and nowhere with my loving new husband.

Activities:
-I want to maintain this workout high I have adopted this last week, eventually leading me to joining a yoga studio and being consistent with it
-I miss painting, creating collages, drawing, or simply just doodling. I used to escape for an hour or so a day by just engaging in one of these activities... my life felt way less stressful, and I was surrounded by art constantly.

Progressions:
-I would love to dive deeply into more Beth Moore Bible studies or perhaps get into a C.H. Spurgeon daily devotional. The two Bible studies I committed to this past year really lit a flare for my spiritual walk, and enlightened my biblical knowledge and understanding.
-As of late, my position at the salon has felt a bit muddled, I have lost my clear focus on my daily tasks and my main purpose in my role as the marketing personnel.... I wish to recapture this in the new year while perhaps moving up through the ranks (however that may mean). God has placed me in the position I am in for a reason and I hate the idea that I am wasting my time and talents when I could be exercising them in new and different ways.
-I want to graduate in 2010. I want so badly to be done with my undergraduate and put my learned skills and refined knowledge to work. It still feels a little impossible, but I know nothing is impossible.

Changes:
-Ben and I are looking to move to a place in Lewisville, where we'll both be closer to our work as well as more accessible to family. This will be a huge change for us, as we both have made our individual lives in Denton for the past 5 or more years. It's scary and exciting all at once. Many new opportunities will arise as well as many new decisions will surface that may change our entire life as we know it. What campus will we make home? Will we continue to plant roots into the Denton community or will we uproot and start anew in Flower Mound or maybe even Dallas?

What is your 2010 Wish List? What do you hope to accomplish, change, or at least aim for?

I thank God for the opportunity to see another year come and go. This last year had its challenges and heights, but it was a year that saw many great times with friends and family and will forever host a very important date for Benjamin and me. As I told Ben's father yesterday, we grew deeper with one another during our experienced vallies this last year and our relationship was polished with the sweet moments. I cannot wait to see what this next year holds, it is promised to be a good year, but only time will tell how great it may be.

consider the lilies of the field

Lord,

Please forgive my jealous heart. I am too quick to envy what I do not have, or judge what I do not want.

This is not a heart that is filled with worship and adoration for the many blessings you have provided me. Please forgive my sinful nature, and please replace my evil ways with habits that are of you, for you, and that glorify you.

Amen.

I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart;
I will recount all of your wonderful deeds.
-Psalm 9:1

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.
-Phillippians 4:6

In the midst of my disobedience, my spirit quotes to me Job 38... who am I to question the Lord's doings? My discontent soul darkens his counsel with thoughts lacking in knowledge. I am far more blessed than a vast majority of this world's population. Who am I to want more when I deserve death?

Lift your eyes and look to the heavens;
Who created all these?
He who brings out the starry host on by one,
and calls them each by name.
Because of his great power and mighty strength,
not one of them is missing
-Isaiah 40:26

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: they do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are then birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

Consider the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith!... do not worry about it... your Father knows that you need them.
-Luke 12:22 - 30

...so will you....?

i don't remember what exactly he said before that, and i can only imagine what followed was the traditional question hundreds have asked for centuries before us.

"...so will you..... marry me?"

simple words that paused this world for a lifetime of moments. simple words that i have been anxious for since this time last year. simple words that will now unite two into one for the glory of God's name.

it started with a date night my family has made tradition for years now. every year around this time we make it a point to go christmas light looking around highland park or other wealthy dallas neighborhoods. last year i was unable to go due to work... see previous post... so i made it a point to attend this year despite the fact we had an event scheduled for the salon and i would be getting off work way late.

God intervened..... with the swine flu as his tool. a key person had to cancel because she came down with the swine flu, therefore the entire event was cancelled - and i was free to meet with the family early.

everyone met up to gather into one car (ben, myself, laurie, cody, kylie, allie, dad, michael, and jennifer) and off we went to highland park for lights, laughter, and christmas card pictures..... ? michael, a photographer and dearest of friends, offered to take pictures of the new family (laurie/ cody/ kylie) so they can send out their first christmas cards. i did not think anything of this.

after driving around for a while in a crowded yet comfortable suv, we found the perfect spot for the new galloway's card. it was a beautifully decorated mansion just off preston and armstrong, where there were giant trees on vast medians, and horse carriage rides on each street. as the family unloaded from the tahoe, my family went to the right while ben saw something "strange" on the lit up tree in the median that he wanted to inspect. "i'll go with you."

we stood underneath the most colorful tree on the block, and ben asked "do you like it?"

"yeah, it's a pretty tree."

"but do you love it?"

"i mean, they did a good job decorating it. i couldn't have done it...."

"well i love it, and i love you. and i want to ask you something........ " (kneeling down on one knee)

- and blank -

i have no idea what romantic speech he quoted to me. i know he declared he wants me to sharpen him and him sharpen me for the rest of our lives. he said something else about him loving me from the beginning, and vows to love me for the rest of our lives....

honestly i was just concerned about getting my left glove off in time for the ring appearance. also there were carriage riders surrounding us, intermittently, and would root us on from their places upon passing us.... so that was fun and distracting!

then came the ring. in a red velvet box, under the most brilliantly lit tree in dallas, he opened the box and requested my hand in marriage. the soft green peridot gem sparkled up at me, inviting me to breathe in this moment. this moment that lasted a lifetime of breaths. it was so dainty. it was so pretty. exactly what i wanted.

he took my left hand, picked the ring up from its safe keeping. and i touched it... and dropped it. we then had to find it. and we did! all was well.

i said "yes!" yes! of course yes! this was a moment i had been waiting for for over a year, and had been expecting for weeks now.

i said yes, and the crowd went wild! pictures that had been snapping in the background came to life vivaciously when he lifted up and took me in his arms. my sisters were cheering, my dad was tearing up. it was wonderful. perfect. exactly what i dreamed of a moment like that to be.

the rest of the night was middling. just a great time with the family, a routine starbucks stop, and back home to rest the night away.

we ended the night with a goodnight's kiss. one of the first kisses to celebrate the beginning of our newest adventure.

i'm engaged! to the most wonderful man i have ever met. i'm in love and excited. i'm engaged! i'm engaged. :) this is going to be fun.

holiday leisures

christmas time is finally just around the corner. it feels like only yesterday i was hustling around a busy boutique trying to help maniac customers find their "perfect" gift for the special someone. i am so thankful i am not working in a specialty retail store like my previous place of business anymore. the crazed customers, lengthy hours, and tense co-workers can really suck the life out of you and definitely drains the excitement of any holiday spirit.

it's a weird feeling getting to experience the christmas fever for the first time in a long time. by this time last year (or any year before last) i would be stressed, exhausted, and dreading whatever tomorrow would bring. not this year. no, i get the breathe this year. drink up the chill and thrill this time of year can bring. i get to just be during this time. it has made for a much nicer lindsey, that's for sure.

also i haven't been forced to endure christmas music since the week before thanksgiving until now.... i have been able to choose my own insanity based on my temporary emotions and what else is on the radio. seriously, i've said this many times before, but i just don't think retail is good for anyone to work in (especially during the holiday season) due to the consequences it can have on one's mind/heart/feelings.

because i have been able to enjoy this holiday season on my own time, i have a few things that i can already call favorites, or perhaps what is to be looked most forward to. and they are as follows:

favorite songs thus far
michael buble - i'll be home for christmas
dean martin - baby, it's cold outside
hallelujah by whoever sings it in the most haunting manner

things i'm looking most forward to
christmas decoration sight seeing with the fam, or at least with benjers
the nutcracker (televised or rented)
watching scrooge with my family and benjies... a family tradition
watching a christmas story on rerun all christmas day!!
hot cocoa in the right hand while walking around the square with my left hand attached to ben's right hand..... this is a must sometime soon.


k, that is all for now.... the later in the season it get's i'm positive i'll have more updates. until then.

i realized my sporadic feeling of discontent comes from my lack of living a good story... I do not make the most of my days but instead dwell on pasts forgotten or wish for more exciting tomorrows. I have a good life. I just need to learn to live it

...over one year later...

diligence. maybe not my style, always.

life has changed tremendously since my last post. i quit a job i felt so lonely in, took on two jobs that were more or less stopping points on a wide and vast growth spurt, left both of those jobs for my current one where i am learning/ growing/ expanding each day from and within. i am finally figuring out who i am more and more each day, with the understanding that i will be a completely different person 5 years from who i am today.

my spiritual walk is sincere, and deeper than i could have ever imagined. i credit a lot of my new found understanding to beth moore's daniel study. so impacting. never wanted it to end. it's refreshing to receive spiritual guidance from one place or medium that is completely aligned with the teachings i receive weekly from the village. nothing contradicts. all is found from biblical truth that was not sifted through men's hands.

ben and i are one year closer to marriage... i feel. we have been through a lifetime of heights and struggles, and only a stronger bond to show for it. we are both learning how to make necessary sacrifices of self in order to live for Christ and honor the each other. we have a long way to go before the relationship becomes easy, but it is one bumpy road i am looking most forward to.

i am reading donald miller's 'a million miles in a thousand years,' and with each turn of the page i am reminded on how small my life is in comparison to this world. how insignificant my story is in the grand scheme of life. also, it is a constant reminder that i would not be mad if donald and i were friends. there was that one time i met him...

i am frustrated with college. more frustrated than i've been in a while. each passing semester should make one happy and elated with the promising future of their graduation. not for me. with each passing semester life gets that much harder to navigate through. currently i am facing the questions: how am i going to finish paying for this current semester? how am i going to pay for the next few? how will i continue working at the first job i love while finishing with the mundane classes that i dread? my impending graduation date seems further off than a million bucks, i don't know how to find joy, patience or clarity in this "special time of my life."

i still love my jupiter house coffee... and i could go for some right now. but i won't.

hokay. until... 2010...